A golfer goes *whack* "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" *whack*. Alexa will tell you a joke if you simply ask it to -- just say "Alexa, tell me a joke." An exercise for people who are out of shape: Begin with a five-pound potato bag in each hand. She danced on the dining room table. So what’s the Wi‑Fi password? Dad listened for a few seconds before telling my mother, “It’s for you,” and handing her the phone. What's orange and sounds like a parrot? “I wear this... During a job interview at the 99 Cents store, my son was asked, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” My son’s reply: “At the Dollar Store.” He got the job. It fit perfectly, and the skirt was a swirl of intricate pleats. He told me a story one day about an inmate he knew back years ago. And each time, I’d tell my 12-year-old daughter, “A train just went by. 25. Her face grew red, When the gentleman said ... “Look at the legs on that table!” —Clo Dodge. Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? Then it hit me. If my father was in a doctor’s waiting room and saw another old-timer looking dejected, he’d shuffle up and tell him, “A rabbit goes to the dentist, and the dentist says, ‘I need to pull a tooth, but I’ll give you Novocain.’ The rabbit answered, ‘Uh-uh! My father liked to say, “I’m bald because a good man always comes out on top.” Dad loved to make people laugh. Scientists say Jupiter cant support human life but maybe Jupiter’s just really focused on her career for now. “Oh!” I shouted. “Sure,” said the first guy. 3 men were standing in … For example, my Twitter is basically a résumé of the pathetic attempts at humor that people who interact with me daily have to deal with. Wataaaaah! 5. Headline from the Seattle PostIntelligencer: “Mom Warns Son to ‘Watch Out for Idiots,’ Rear‑Ends His Motorcycle.”, Me: What’s the Wi-Fi password? An exercise for people who are out of shape: Begin with a five-pound potato bag in each hand. These hilarious jokes will turn your frown upside down before you … T., via e-mail. —Beverly Gross. It's important to talk to a dermatologist about any medical concerns you may have. On the way to meet my husband at a restaurant, I realized that I didn’t have my phone and immediately panicked. Read this: 50 Terrible Children’s Jokes Guaranteed To Crack You Up. As my two sons were climbing into the back seat of our car, Eric, five, yelled, “I call the left side!” That didn’t sit well with Ron, four. Ahead, we've rounded up the funniest silly jokes everyone will love. The first day on the job, he opens his lunch box and mumbles, “Oh no, peanut butter!” The next day, “Peanut butter again!” This goes on for days, until another worker says, “Why don’t you ask your wife to make a different lunch?” Joe replies, “I’m not married. Ed: Not only is it awful, it’s awful. Because they’re really good at it. Where does the General keep his armies? I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. Between you and me, something smells. I said, “Are you telling me other people are trying to put money into... WebMD is updating its server because of a virus. My brother passed away this morning. “Do you know how they make these gloves?” he asked. While playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting furniture, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?" 1 decade ago. A woman walks into a library and asked if they had any books about paranoia. Scene: With a patient in my medical exam room Me: How old are your kids? “My dog is so smart,” says the first owner, “that every morning he goes to the store and buys me... My mother was browsing in a store when a saleswoman offered assistance. 1. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

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